TheBabyCarriers

Archive for the ‘Parenting’ Category

The next day I started to put parental controls on the computer. At first I was just going to block usage for a particular period of time but then I other features I had never looked into before. There were very specific ways that I could put limits on the computer. Now that we had it temporarily in a child’s
bedroom I knew it was the perfect opportunity.

I remember doing the same thing with our satellite boxes. We blocked out certain ratings for programs, certain content and password protected those programs. It’s a comforting feeling to know that you have the control on television limits. I felt that same sense of comfort knowing I now had more controls on the computer. But as I checked off boxes that would disable them, such as sexual content or anything with drugs and alcohol, I thought to myself, “How nice it would be to have parental controls like these over my children’s lives.” Wouldn’t it be nice to just point a remote at your child and click “disable” to certain things? Why can’t I block my children from sexual content? Why can’t I block them from vulgar language? It would be nice but it simply isn’t possible.

I wish tweens and teens came with parental controls. I was thinking about that the other day when I was setting time limits on our computer. Recently our family did some renovating and moving around of bedrooms. What used to be the bedroom for my husband and I became my youngest son’s bedroom. We had to temporarily leave the computer in that room until we are able to purchase a new computer desk and move it into the living room. Well one night I woke up at 2 a.m. to use the bathroom and discovered my tween son was on the computer playing a game. I was not very happy.

When it comes to parental control over our children’s lives we are very limited. There are some controls we can enforce but when they are out of our sight we no longer have the ability to disable or stop something. We have to trust that they will make the right decisions and choices. Unfortunately they won’t always do that. Tweens and teens are facing a lot of “content” that we would like them to avoid. But there is no password protection there.

Since we can’t control the content they are exposed to then we have to be willing to talk about those issues. We can’t control our children with a remote but we can have open and honest conversations that will guide them. Talking to your teen is the best thing you can do. You will be surprised at how much they really take in what you say and how influenced they are by your words. You may not have the power of a remote but you do have the power of influence. Use that influence to help guide your children so that when they do face negative content they will know how to turn it off.

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Baby signing is using gestures or signs to communicate with your baby. Many moms use American or British Sign Language when teaching their babies to sign but it is perfectly okay to create your own signs.

The purpose of baby signing is to communicate with your baby. Babies are able to use hand gestures much earlier than they can communicate with words. Not being able to communicate can be frustrating for baby and mom. Teaching your baby signs gives her the opportunity to communicate with you possibly months before she can actually talk.

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With the sour economy still hovering over our nation’s consciousness, I can’t help but wonder how our kids would be affected if we were to really hit hard times. One thing I know for sure is its affect on me as a child, and how it continues to affect me as a parent today.

My story doesn’t begin with, “Although we didn’t have very much, we were rich in laughter and our days were carefree.”

No, as a single parent carrying the burden of being the bread winner, my mother constantly worried and was rarely at rest in her heart.

I was the oldest in the family and saw up close how being restless affected her moods. Looking back, I think she tried to distract herself from worry by being busy or controlling. While some children resort to apathy (as to not rock the boat), I compensated by putting her worries on my own shoulders. I would be my mom’s hero.

Our family checkbook was open for me to see, so I was often concerned whether we’d have enough for clothes, food, school supplies and the bills. One of my biggest worries came when one of us got sick, since we couldn’t afford to see the doctor. I still remember how anxious I felt, hearing my little sister cough at night, unsure if it’s simply a cold or something more.

With mom too worried and busy coping with her own problems, I grew up too quickly without the perspective from one who is at rest with herself and with the world.

So I told myself when I was young and thinking about life — if I ever get to be a mom, even if I hit hard times — I want to be the mom who doesn’t pass worry onto my kids.

It’s true that growing up early in life has made me stronger and more resourceful than if I hadn’t gone through it. And out of my need for someone to guide and care for me, my faith in God grew deep and real.

But like a drop of water on the dessert ground, my childhood disappeared, with too much knowledge on a heart that was too young.

I’d rather pass on joy and laughter to my children. I want them to remember mommy smiling more than worrying.

After all, my kids will have their own share of headaches and heartache. With or without money, that’s just the honest truth.

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